Not so long ago, I watched a colleague tank a major client meeting before it even started. Not with a bad pitch or fumbling the numbers—with his greeting. A too-eager “Hey guys!” to a room of executives who’d already mentally filed him under “junior.” The slight pause, the exchanged glances, the subtle shift in body language. Deal over. Coffee hadn’t even arrived.
We obsess over our resumes, our presentations, our LinkedIn profiles. Meanwhile, those first seven seconds of interaction? That’s where the real judgment happens. And most of us are walking around with greetings that signal all the wrong things.
After years in brand and media work where perception is currency, I learned that certain greetings don’t just fall flat—they actively work against you. They broadcast insecurity, desperation, or worse, that you don’t understand the social dynamics of the room you just entered.
Here are the seven that need to go.
1. The overfamiliar “Hey guys!”
This one physically hurts to watch in professional settings. You’re not addressing your college roommates. You’re in a meeting, a networking event, or meeting your partner’s parents for the first time.
“Hey guys!” signals that you either don’t read rooms or don’t care to adjust your communication style. Both are career killers.
I’ve seen twenty-somethings use this with CEOs. I’ve watched it happen at formal dinners. Each time, the person using it becomes instantly forgettable—or memorable for the wrong reasons.
What it actually communicates: “I don’t understand hierarchy, formality levels, or professional boundaries.”
Try instead: Read the room first. “Good morning, everyone” works. “Hello” works. Match the energy and formality level already established.
2. The apologetic entrance
“Sorry, hi, sorry to interrupt, just wanted to say hi real quick…”
You haven’t done anything wrong. You’re at a networking event. Or a party. Or joining a Zoom call. Why are you apologizing for existing?
This greeting makes people uncomfortable because now they have to reassure you that your presence is fine. You’ve turned a simple introduction into emotional labor for everyone else.
I test people with small boundaries early, and the chronic apologizers always reveal themselves immediately. They’ll apologize for sending emails during business hours. For having opinions. For taking up space.
What it signals: Low confidence and a need for constant validation.
Better approach: Own your entrance. “Hi, I’m Claire” beats “Sorry, hi, I’m Claire” every single time.
3. The name-dropper special
“Hi, I’m Claire—mutual friend of Jessica’s, you know, from the Goldman thing?”
Stop. Just stop.
When you lead with connections instead of yourself, you’re essentially saying you have no inherent value. You’re borrowing someone else’s social capital because you don’t believe you have any of your own.
I’ve helped friends rewrite countless intro messages, and this pattern shows up constantly. They list every possible connection, achievement, or credential before getting to who they actually are.
The people worth knowing don’t need you to justify your presence through association.
What this broadcasts: “I don’t think I’m interesting enough on my own.”
Do this instead: Introduce yourself first. Let connections come up naturally in conversation if they’re relevant.
4. The diminisher
“I’m just Claire” or “I’m only in marketing” or “I’m nobody special, but…”
This isn’t humility. It’s self-sabotage.
When you diminish yourself in your greeting, you’re training people to see you as less than. And they will. People take their cues from how you present yourself, and you’ve just handed them a script that says “I’m not worth your time.”
I once watched a brilliant strategist introduce herself as “just helping out with some projects” to a room full of potential clients. Those clients never took her seriously. Why would they? She’d already told them not to.
What you’re really saying: “Please don’t expect much from me.”
Try this: State who you are and what you do without editorial commentary. Let them decide your value.
5. The comedian’s opening
“Well, this is awkward!” or “I promise I’m not as boring as I look!”
Self-deprecating humor as an opening move is anxiety dressed up as personality.
Sure, humor can break tension. But when it’s your default greeting, you’re using jokes as armor. You’re rejecting yourself before anyone else can.
I’ve noticed this especially in high-pressure networking situations. The joke-greeting is meant to lower expectations, to make you seem approachable. Instead, it makes you seem insecure.
What this signals: “I’m uncomfortable and need you to like me immediately.”
Better move: Save the humor for when it’s organic. A simple, confident greeting sets a much stronger foundation.
“Hi! Oh my god, crazy morning, my kid was sick, then traffic was insane, and I spilled coffee all over myself—anyway, hi, I’m Claire!”
We’ve all been there. Nervous energy manifesting as a word volcano.
But when you lead with chaos, you’re telling people that you’re overwhelmed and probably unreliable. You’re also forcing strangers to process your personal life before they even know your last name.
In media and brand work, I learned that every interaction is a micro-pitch. What are you pitching when you lead with dysfunction?
What you’re broadcasting: “I don’t have boundaries or situational awareness.”
Instead: Take a breath. Center yourself. Share the chaos stories after you’ve established rapport, not as your opening line.
7. The question deflector
“How are you?”
“Oh, you don’t want to know!” or “Better than I deserve!”
These aren’t greetings. They’re emotional manipulation.
The first forces people to insist they do want to know (when they were just being polite). The second is fake humility that makes everyone uncomfortable.
Both create this weird dynamic where the other person has to manage your response to a basic social nicety. It’s exhausting.
What this communicates: “I need constant emotional management from everyone around me.”
Do this: “Good, thanks! How are you?” Simple. Clean. Doesn’t require emotional labor from strangers.
Final thoughts
Here’s what I’ve learned after years of watching people build and destroy their personal brands in seven seconds flat: Your greeting is your first piece of content. It’s the trailer for the movie of you.
Most of us learned these patterns young—maybe from parents who apologized too much, or environments where confidence was seen as arrogance. But you’re not stuck with them.
Start paying attention to how you enter rooms, both physical and virtual. Notice when you apologize for existing. Catch yourself before you diminish your accomplishments or deflect with humor.
The most successful people I know have boring greetings. “Hi, I’m Sarah.” “Good morning.” “Nice to meet you.” They’re not trying to manage your perception through verbal gymnastics. They trust that who they are is enough.
And here’s the thing—changing your greeting changes how people see you, but more importantly, it changes how you see yourself. When you stop apologizing for entering rooms, you start believing you belong there.
Next time you meet someone new, resist the urge to justify, diminish, or entertain. Just introduce yourself. Trust that your presence is enough.
Because if you don’t believe that, why should anyone else?
